


Contented Creatures

by Artemis_Dreamer



Series: The Squishy Apocalypse [9]
Category: Transformers - All Media Types, Transformers Generation One
Genre: Cuddling & Snuggling, Dessert & Sweets, Drabble, Fat Robots, Fluff, I'm Going to Hell, M/M, Not Canon Compliant, OT5, Rare Pairings, Unconventional Problem Solving, Weight Gain
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-14
Updated: 2017-03-14
Packaged: 2018-10-05 00:24:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,463
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10293251
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Artemis_Dreamer/pseuds/Artemis_Dreamer
Summary: The triceratops grumbled with contentment at the delicious taste of the chocolate treat. An answering grumble echoed from the vocalizers of the four other bestial mechs as they nuzzled even closer to their mate.---In which the Dinobots are behaving strangely, and Optimus Prime goes looking for answers.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Fields_of_Heather](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fields_of_Heather/gifts).



> WARNING: This is a work of fetish fiction, involving weight gain and unhealthy eating.
> 
> Don't like, don't read.

The common perception among the Autobots was that the Dinobots were brutish and simplistic mechs, that they were little more than mechanimals. Not, of course, that anymech would be willing to admit to such a mindset.

To be perfectly fair, in most cases this bias was not a conscious one. Due to the simplistic speech patterns and bestial alt modes of the Dinobots, most mechs automatically assumed that they lacked intelligence - and treated them accordingly. It was a bias that Wheeljack was trying his damnedest to correct, but thus far, he had encountered little success. The general chaos that that the Dinobots wrought on an ornly basis did little to help his cause.

Oftentimes, the instigator of such chaos was Slag. The triceratops was undeniably the most foul-tempered of the five saurian mechs, and could easily be provoked to anger by even the most seemingly innocuous of comments. 

A casual comment made by Kup stating that Swoop was the most agile of the five Dinobots had resulted in the near-destruction of the Ark's training facility – Slag had been enraged at the implication that he was inferior. (The veteran mech had spent orns dislodging chunks of his obstacle course from the room’s ceiling, cursing colorfully all the while.) 

A recommendation that the triceratops undergo more frequent maintenance had resulted in the near-destruction of the medbay – Slag thoroughly loathed medical procedures and the mechs who performed them. (Ratchet had subsequently banished Wheeljack from their shared berthroom, forcing the unfortunate inventor to spend the next decaorn sleeping on a sofa in the hallway.) 

And a tactless joke made by Sideswipe regarding the Dinobots' poor taste in television programming had resulted in the near-destruction of the rec room – Slag refused to allow such an insult to go unchallenged. (Prowl had complained at great length to anymech who would listen about the excessive cost of acquiring a new television.)

Yes, Slag was incredibly foul-tempered, and incredibly destructive. 

His fellow Dinobots, displaying an intelligence that most other bots believed was beyond the capacity of their processors, had devised a solution to this problem - a solution that was as simple as it was brilliant.

The Autobots didn't notice, of course, until three consecutive decaorns passed without a single destructive incident. Even then, it was likely that they still wouldn't have noticed, if it hadn't been for Spike. Spike made a casual comment about the fact that the snack foods he’d been storing in the Ark’s refrigerator had inexplicably gone missing. Prowl, of course, had insisted on performing an investigation into this act of theft. 

The investigation had spanned the entirety of the Autobots’ base, and by the time that the usual suspects (including Jazz, Sideswipe, and an indignant Bumblebee) had been proven innocent, only the den belonging to the five Dinobots had yet to be searched.

Everymech referred to those shared quarters as a den, and nomech seemed to realize that the use of such a term was in fact a subconscious admission of their shared belief that the Dinobots were essentially little more than beasts. 

Most bots assumed that the reason the five mechs shared quarters was related in some way to the primitive nature of their processors - a pack instinct, perhaps. Only Wheeljack was aware that the five dinosaurs were in fact bondmates, and that they chose to reside together in order to preserve the strength of their bond. The inventor had never seen fit to mention it, simply because nomech else would understand. After all, the common perception among the Autobots, and among most non-seekers in general, was that a civilized mech only bonded with a single mate.

It was Optimus Prime who bravely took it upon himself to enter the Dinobots' den, determined to seek out any trace of the missing snack foods. Therefore, it was Optimus Prime who was the first to discover exactly why Slag hadn't caused even the slightest amount of trouble over the course of the last three decaorns. 

Every solid surface in the den was covered in heaping piles of food, including a multitude of Ratchet's sweets, all of Spike’s snacks, and a variety of other foodstuffs of unknown origin. At the centre of it all, relaxing contentedly on the floor beneath a heap of all four of his saurian bondmates, was Slag. 

Perfectly at ease in his bestial form, the triceratops took another messy bite from the cake that had been positioned between his forelimbs, and grumbled with contentment at the delicious taste of the chocolate treat. An answering grumble echoed from the vocalizers of the four other bestial mechs as they nuzzled even closer to their mate.

Optimus stood in the doorway of the room in shocked silence, his processor working furiously as he attempted to comprehend the strange situation. One of his Dinobots was consuming stolen human fuel, and judging by the numerous wrappers and prodigious amount of crumbs that lay scattered around the heap of saurian mechs, he had already consumed an incredible amount.

Continuing to assess the situation, Optimus realized that this display of gluttony was not the first of its kind. Clearly, Slag had gorged himself in this manner numerous times to date. There was no other explanation for the huge increase in the Dinobot's overall mass.

Even from his reclining position half-buried beneath four other mechs, the changes to the triceratops' frame were readily apparent. His limbs and tail were far thicker and heavier than before, and his blocky hindquarters had softened into a vastly rounded haunch. This, of course, was to say nothing of the Dinobot's massively fat low-slung underbelly, or his thickly padded chassis and flanks. 

Optimus continued to stare speechlessly, watching as Snarl buried his muzzle in the softness of that padded flank, as Swoop relaxed his wings across those thick haunches, and as Sludge cuddled closely against that massive belly. Atop the pile was Grimlock, who seemed to be affectionately nibbling the triceratops' thick neck with as much gentleness as a tyrannosaur could possibly muster.

Finally, the Prime found his voice. Well, enough of his voice to utter a single word. "Explain." 

There were a series of irate grumbles and growls from the heap of saurian mechs, along with a great deal of nudging and shoving. At length, Grimlock extricated himself from the pile and approached the Autobot leader. Looming over the Prime in his bestial form, Grimlock huffed an annoyed exvent through his nostrils. When he spoke, his tone was a low growl, but there was no aggression in it. The mech was merely annoyed.

"Hungry Slag is angry Slag. Full Slag is happy Slag. Dinobots keep Slag happy. Dinobots keep Slag full." 

Grimlock huffed another exvent, rolled his optics at the foolishness of such a question, and lumbered back over to the pile of Dinobots. A fair amount of grumbling and shifting ensued as the other saurians moved to accommodate their leader’s frame, but within mere moments the matter had been settled and the lazy pile of contented mechs had reformed. 

The Dinobots promptly returned to the task of cuddling their mate, seemingly ignoring the fact that the Prime remained in their room. 

If Optimus had been expecting any further explanation, or anything even remotely resembling obedience, he would have been sorely disappointed. He cleared his intake to regain their attention, knowing that it was essential to discipline the Dinobots to prevent them from taking any further liberties. 

Five pairs of azure optics, all smouldering with fury, met his own.

"Slag want Optimus to leave now." The triceratops rumbled dangerously, his vicious beaked jaws snapping up the last bite of that unfortunate cake.

"Sludge agrees." The brontosaurus concurred with a nod.

"Optimus upset Slag." Swoop grumbled, the pterodactyl making a dismissive and presumably rude gesture with his left wing.

"Not supposed to upset Slag." Snarl mumbled, the stegosaurus not even bothering to remove his muzzle from the other's comfortable flank. 

"Optimus go out now," the tyrannosaur growled, "Or Grimlock throw Optimus out."

Faced with the dangerous task of disciplining five angry Dinobots for what was ultimately a minor transgression, the Prime wisely allowed his common sense to triumph over his sense of duty. He retreated from their den, shaking his helm with bewilderment. As the doors slid shut, he saw Sludge carefully nudge another cake into the space between Slag's forelimbs – the greedy triceratops immediately dug in with reckless abandon.

The Dinobots had apparently decided that all of life's problems could be solved through the consumption of fuel.

In summation, four violent and dangerous saurian mechs had stolen every scrap of snack food aboard the Ark in order to feed and placate the fifth among their number. How exactly was he supposed to explain that to Spike?

Pit, how exactly was he supposed to explain that to anymech?

**Author's Note:**

> For Fields_of_Heather - thank you so much for your patience! Hope you enjoyed your squishy triceratops cuddles!
> 
> I might be the only one who ships the Dinobots as an OT5, but in way, I feel it makes sense for them to be bonded. I'm also of the opinion that the Dinobots aren't stupid or comic relief - they just communicate differently. (One of the reasons why I disliked Season 3 of the 1980s cartoon.)
> 
> I'm still taking requests, though there is definitely a wait time. G1, Animated, or Prime, any mech or pairing you'd prefer. This is, after all, the Squishy Apocalypse - let's see if we can take over the TF world. XD
> 
> Any and all feedback is appreciated.


End file.
